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The rehabilitation of Tom Cruise’s image continues; After getting rave reviews for his comedic turn in Tropic Thunder, Cruise is rumored to be cast  in the 4th installment of the ‘Shrek’ franchise: Shrek Goes Fourth.

The buzz is that Tom will play the villain in the latest fairy-tale flick. Who knew Tom Thumb was evil? I mean, Cruise is playing Tom Thumb, right? It only makes sense - he’s been preparing for the role since puberty, apparently?

If all works out, the couch-jumping Cruise is about to get even more animated!

Actress Tom Cruise’s wife, Katie Holmes, has been wearing a pair of baggy, men’s denim jeans while walking around New York City the past few days.

Us Magazine is reporting that Kate is not just wearing men’s jeans, but that the jeans belong to hubby Tom Cruise.

Holmes could be starting a fashion trend? Or, she needs to laundry? Maybe, she’s bitter about turning down her role in ‘The Dark Knight’?

The big question I have is:  If the jeans really are a pair of Tom’s, wouldn’t they fit more like this on Kate?

just sayin . . .

Suri Cruise is following in her fathers footsteps protocol and staring opposite another popular robot, Wall-E. Early reviews are very positive,

” With a little WD40, Suri could be the next Keanu Reeves.”

” More life-like than any Disneyland Animatronic, including Abe Lincoln!”

” Unlike Tom’s(Cruise) recent films, I had my eye’s wide open!”

Congratulations Suri Cruise. Your first film is getting better buisness than your mothers new play!

Suri Cruise is like a ‘Tickle Me Elmo’, ever year she gets an upgrade! For Suri’s second year she is learning to tap dance. If she picks up dancing as quickly as Asimo, she may be a triple-threat(singer, dancer, and actor) in no time!

Her father got his big break in the movie T.A.P.S., looks like Suri will be following in his footsteps.

With a bit more practice and programming, Suri Cruise can turn into Suri Temple!

“On the good chip, lollipop.”

A more subdued Tom Cruise sat down with Oprah Winfrey to clear up many questions about the star and his crazy antics of the past couple years. Some of the things they discussed were the ‘couch-jumping’ incident(”it was a moment.”), his chastising Brooke Shields,(”I was wrong about Post Partum Depression.”), and his involvment in Scientology( “I believe in God.”)

The most intriguing segment  though, was when Oprah asked him about the many rumors that daughter Suri is not his biological daughter? Tom then explained the origin of Suri: “She’s spectacular, She really is just magic.”

So there you have it, straight from Tom’s mouth. Suri is all smoke and mirrors just like we expected! Be sure to catch the second part of Oprah’s interview on Monday, where hopefully Tom will explain how he constructed his robo-wife Katie Holmes!

Episode 2 , Return of the Jumper: Along time ago(2005) in a galaxy far, far, away(Chicago) Tom Cruise appeared on ‘Oprah’. During the segmant Tom jumped up and down on Ms. O’s couch, declaring his love for girlfriend Katie Holmes. He would later molest the furniture of ‘The View’, and ‘The Tonight Show’.

Now the prodigal Scientologist returns, to celebrate his 25 years on the silver screen, but this time Oprah isnt taking any Risky Buisness; the episode will be shot at Tom’s Colorado home. Ms Winfrey wont let her set get beaten down by the jumper again. Tomcat can pounce all over his own home furnishings!

His last film, ‘Lions for Lambs’ tanked, and his new movie ‘Valkyrie’, has been pushed back twice! If his career takes another bomb, I see this in Tom’s future. . .

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Suri Cruise turn 2 years old tomorrow (April 18th) and the terrible-two’s may get worse for the kid if this weeks headlines are true.

Tom and Katie’s reported struggle over the celebuBot is enough to make poor Suri short-circuit. I hope they give her a good tune up on her Birthday.

Tired of life in Cruise-control, the mags say that Katie, who may be moving to Manhattan for a gig on Broadway, wants a “trial separation”, but Tom wants to keep her and Suri under his watchful eye. Star and InTouch are never to be 100% trusted, but there is usually a hint of truth to the headlines.

Boy, Little Suri has grown up so fast; nearly as tall as her father and almost as animated as Asimo!

Kids, they upgrade so fast!

Tom Cruise may be starring in a real life Mission Impossible; trying to separate wife Katie Holmes from BFF Victoria Beckham. According to the Daily Mail,  Tom is concerned about the Spice Girl rubbing off on Katie, who views Victoria as “a role model.”

Kate, who has already adopted Posh’s hairstyle and fashion sense has Tom allarmed over her shrinking weight. Katie looks like she’s eating for the number of people who saw ‘Lions for Lambs’: slim to none!

The mag says she lost the weight by following Victoria’s “900 calorie a day eating plan”, which includes “seaweed shakes” and “edamame beans”. I guess a rail thin frame makes Tom want to keep his eyes wide shut? Don’t be glib Tom, it could be worse; Katie could be *gasp!*  taking diet pills!

Although Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are both Catholic, it is rumored that the couple have tapped Tom ‘Corleone’ Cruise to be the Godfather of their twins. Maybe it was the reported $200,000 Tom spent on baby gifts that gave the Scientologist the honor, or maybe he made them an offer they couldn’t refuse.

Jen’s dad is a Scientologist. Maybe he wanted them to be spiritually guided by old L.Ron mother Hubbard. Tom played it cool when approached to be Godfather, but I hear after they left . . .

“Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer” - the Godfather